Subspace

Sub space is described by some as flying, or floating, in the context of a BDSM scene, is a psychological state that can sometimes be entered by the person bottoming in the scene.

Subspace is a metaphor for the state the submissive's mind and body is in during a deeply involved play scene. Many types of BDSM play invoke strong physical responses. The psychological aspect of BDSM also causes many submissives to mentally separate themselves from their environment as they process the experience. Deep subspace is often characterized as a state of deep recession and incoherence. Deep subspace may also cause a danger in newer submissives who are unfamiliar with the experience, and require the dominant to keep a careful watch to ensure the submissive isn't placing him or her self in danger. Many submissives require aftercare while returning from subspace.

It is said that subspace is the point at which the body begins to produce endorphins in order to fend off physical pain. This rush of chemicals in the body makes the submissive feel good and allows them to forget about anything that might be uncomfortable. Their brains are telling them that all is right and they can
continue from the scene into the moments and hours after the scene is over, this is where aftercare is required from their Dominant.

Personally i have never experienced such intensity after a scene but i still live in hope that that may happen for me one day when the right Dominant comes along. But i am sure that if i asked the same question to each submissive i would get a different answer from each one as each submissive who has experienced subspace will be individual to her.

Has any of my readers experienced sub space and if so how did it feel to them?

Seasons Greetings

i just wanted to say Merry Christmas to all my friends and to all those who visit my blog, i hope you all have a wonderful day with those you love and thoughts for those who you are unable to be with.

blossom xx

Aftercare

As most of us know bdsm experiences can be quite exhausting on both parties whether it be emotional or mental energies and so either or both participants may require comforting, emotional support, tenderness, reassurance etc. O/others may just wish to talk about what happened between them or want to be left alone in their own thoughts. Some may require, kissing, cuddling, making love, praise from ones Owner for that period of time. So a couple of questions i would like to ask my readers.





1. How important is it to you to receive aftercare and

2. If you are in a Long Distance Relationship(LDR) and you require aftercare how
do you get it, what is in place so that you dont feel abandoned after the scene?

Feeling Miserable

Well this is exactly how i look and feel for the past week, flu sucks!!

Moving Forward

Update on me.

As most of you know i have been very lucky to have a fantastic Mentor and Trainer and most importantly a friend to me. Well now has come the time for me to move forward and step out into the big bad bdsm world...lol...only kidding but yes i have decided to move forward in the lifestyle and see what is out there for me.

So this post is really to say a huge and massive thank you to Sir for being my friend (which he still is by the way) first and foremost, for guiding me through some dark times at the beginning when i felt lonely and lost. For sharing with me his time, experience, knowledge and guidance and friendship during that time. For helping me regain my submission and believing in myself again. He looked after me so well, was never negative in anything i said or done, always praised me for any tasks i completed for him and for just being me. Introduced me to so many different disciplines, ive learned to express myself through writing, pictures and sharing my feelings.

But its time for me to move on now, i will miss him big time and will always have a deep affection for him, but i need to do this for me and hopefully will meet someone in time who will join me on this journey.

So from me to You a massive thank you. ~smiles at Sir~

Sorry

Well i have to given an apology as i am late in acknowledging a couple of my friends who nominated me for a VBA. So a big thank you to sbf and hs (sorry girlies i dont know how to link to your blogs)for nominating me and for the lovely things you said about me and my blog. i wouldnt know where to begin to nominate other blogs as there are so many who have touched me and i can reasonate with some of the things they say or have happened to them in their lives. it is lovely to have friends that one can turn to and you know that they will all gather like one big family to cheer you up, support you when the need arises.

So i am sorry for not picking particular blogs as i would find that a very difficult thing to do.

So 7 things about me:

i wear my heart on my sleeve

i hardly ever take my own advice but love dishing it out

i love to walk in a forrest while its raining and getting soaked to the skin

i dont like spiders nor mice nor rats nor oh any type of rodent...lol

i absolutely love and adore George Michael, his music is so personal

my favourite tipple is vodka and coke

i love chocolate from Southern Ireland

So again thank you girlies for nominating me and congrats to all those who were also nominated.

Thanks giving

Hi Everyone

i know im probably too late but i will do anyhow wish all my friends (and lurkers to my blog) from across the pond a very happy thanksgiving. i hope you all have a wonderful and joyful time with the ones you love.

blossom xx

Body Worship

Body worship is any practice of physically reverencing a part of another person's body, and is usually done as a submissive act in the context of BDSM. Types of body worship are foot worship, penis worship, vagina worship, and ass worship, these are just general parts im sure there are more other parts that apply just as equally or even clothes e.g. boots etc. This type of act can be popular among people of all sexual orientations and gender identities.

Usually accompanied by prostration, re-enforcing a sense of inferiority, a submissive generally licks, kisses and sucks their dominant's body part when He gives permission for him/her to do so but is not allowed to touch it in a more conventional way.

Worshiping a body can also be done because the worshiper is in awe of the body part and wishes to praise that beauty. Although encouragement may be provided, verbally or by spanking, body worship is typically received more or less passively, the worshipped party aloof.

When i was with my previous dom he loved to to have his feet worshiped , he loved nothing more than to see me lying prostrate or kneeling at his feet, kissing and licking them, i felt so submissive when asked to do this and done it willingly even though that is a part of the body which does absolutely nothing for me...lol.

So what i wanted to ask you is do you have a special part of your Owners body that you love, do you pay particular attention to it. How would you feel if you were made to worship their body part as part of your service??

Bit of Fun

Hello

i thought it would be a bit of fun if we all completed the following by putting in a word prior to 'slut' to see how far we get.

ill start off

i am a sensuous slut

blossom x

Beautiful

A good friend of mine sent me this video and i wanted to share it with you all. i love the music that accompanies the images that are in the video. Thank you. (you know who you are!!)

Reflection

“You’re not the only one who’s made mistakes, but they’re the only things that you can truly call your own. ” — Unknown

Being Open

When a submissive first has contact with a potential Dominant questions are asked, exactly how open would you be with Him. Do you find it easy to share aspects of your life with someone who you have just met? or do you close up and not share.

Obviously we all have to feel comfortable with the person we are talking with and i feel it all depends on the Dominant, to me its his responsibility to make the submissive relax and feel that she can share and tell Him anything and not feel she is being interrogated.

i know with Sir i felt totally relaxed from the very beginning, i could share everything and anything He asked me, and if i had a problem in talking about anything in particular He didnt push me on it but said that i could talk to Him when i felt the time was right.

To start off this way leads to building up of trust, faith etc in the Dominant so that activities that both enjoy will be carried out safely, so being as open as you possibly can with your Dominant is paramount. Though i know there are certain things that a submissive may not wish to say to the Dominant, as they feel that it will put the Dominant off, they feel they may be responsible for what happened to them, but if you meet the right person believe me it will be so easy for you to talk about it, and they will take the time and let it come out naturally, they wont rush you, if he is the Dominant for you.

Control

i just wanted to throw a question out to the readers of my blog, a submissive's life is controlled by her Dominant, be it for what she is allowed to eat, drink, some even to the point of going to the bathroom. So the questions i wanted to ask is, does this enhance your submission or do you feel it stiffles your submission?

Personally i love to know that a Dominant would have that much control over me, especially if in a LDR, i think it is needed more to focus the submissive on her submission, i know it can be awkward at times especially if one needs to use the bathroom urgently...lol, but rules can be set for episodes like that.

Ritual

"Ritual is important. It is fulfilling and meaningful. It is beautiful. It is symbolic, mnemonic, and instructive. It establishes protocols. It expresses, defines, and clarifies conditions. It is essential to, and ingredient within, civilization. Similarly, do not overlook the significance and value of symbolism.” John Norman

Do you have a favourite ritual?

Im Back

Hello fellow bloggers

Well i am back after a brilliant holiday, still feeling a bit jetlagged but am glad to be back, so hopefully catch up with all thats been going on in your blogs and get back to commenting.

Happy to be home.

blossom x

Away

Well folks i am going away for a well deserved holiday, i am looking forward to the break after working all year, and well a certain someone has been keeping me pretty busy too!!! ~smiling at Sir~ not that i am complaining, would i ever...lol. So will see you all in two weeks time.

Thank You

A big thank you to all of you who have visited my blog, i have just realised that i have had over 10,000 page views, thank you all so much, it makes the blog worthwhile when i see that.

Poem

This lovely piece of writing was sent to me by a friend and i would like to share it with you all.

a bond that ties together
tightly burns into the flesh
the rope marks are left
to be licked and soothed
kisses healing
with bites hinting at more to come
even drawing a little blood
to merge together

Update on me

Hi everyone

i just thought i would like to give you a short update as to how things are going with me and my Mentor.

Well all i can say is that it is more than i ever had wished for, i am finding out things about myself that i never thought would be possible, i am finding out new things about me, i am trying new and different things, i am loving and embracing my submission again, i thought it was lost after his leaving me, i floundered with who i was, but not anymore, i have learned to trust again thanks to Sir, i have been nurtured, encouraged, praised, pushed outside my comfort zones, have had delightful punishments (of which i hope there will be more...smiles prettily at Sir) and there are other things that He has discussed with me which i have yet to experience and i am so looking forward to those, i am growing in my submission with Him.

i am learning to be more open, i am learning to express myself with Him. Sir has brought out a creative side of me, writing poems and sharing stories with Him, being ultra creative in responding to tasks He has set for me, learning to plead prettily (this comes in real handy...lol)

He has given me something that i never thought i would have again, He has given me back 'ME', He has made me feel beautiful again as a submissive, and has shown me how actually strong and proud i am as a submissive, i have been made to feel whole again and for that i cannot thank Him enough.

Thank you Sir ~smiling~

Animal

For a bit of fun if you could be an animal which one would you be and why???

i would like to be a dog, why? because i am loyal, dependant, compassionate, exciteable, fun to be with, and i do love a good walk on a leash!!!!!....lol, and also love to curl up at One's feet.

Its not a game

i desire to submit to Him
its not a game

i desire to embrace my submission for Him
its not a game

i desire to give up my strengths to Him
its not a game

i desire to give control of me to Him
its not a game

i desire to be obedient for Him
its not a game

i desire to please Him
its not a game

i desire to be sensuous for Him
its not a game

i desire to be aroused for Him
its not a game

i desire to kneel before Him
its not a game

i desire to lie at His feet
its not a game

i desire to wear His collar with pride
its not a game

i desire to be owned by Him
its not a game

Shibari

A Master at work, how cool is this, i would love to experience this.

TubeHome.com Video from everywhere!

Surviving

i found this article on how to survive a break up and thought it very interesting as i have experienced the emotions and feelings that is described in the article, so i thought i would share this with others as they could be going through something similar and maybe have no one to speak to. But i wanted them to know what they are feeling and experiencing, we all, or anyone who has gone through this, will have had some of, if not these same feelings.

i feel she describes everything so well. it is a bit long,but i am unsure how to link things to articles etc, (not techi that way) but it is worth reading.

How To Survive A Breakup In A BDSM Relationship
By Dorothy Hayden

THE BREAKUP
Submissives in the throes of a breakup with their dominant often ask me if I think the pain of relationship breakup is different from "vanilla" relationship breakups and how they can make sense of the feelings of horrific loss, confusion, anger and disorientation that they feel.

First of all, I think the dynamics of Ds relationships are very different from "vanilla" relationships. Different dynamics give rise to different feelings about relationship loss.

For the submissive individual, the bond of relationship is everything. Being a bottom offers fulfillment by enabling the submissive to feel merged with another human being. The bond to the dom is an intense one, giving meaning, value, fulfillment and a sense of identity through the activities of serving and pleasing. For some dominants, however, an intimate bond is harder to achieve, as he/she sometimes treats the partner almost as a nonentity. A slave, after all, is a nonexistent person to the dom in whose eyes the sub may have less and less to offer. As a result, the dom often loses interest quickly and consequently tends to want to change partners more frequently to achieve the conquest of having a new slave (who sometimes is more of an object than a person).

After all, it is control and admiration that motivates many doms, rather than commitment to growth, exploration and stability in one relationship.

Being a submissive often involves a certain disavowal of self. The self ceases to be a decision-maker or a person capable of exerting initiative while in the relationship. Moreover, the normal identity of the individual is suspended in the process of serving the dominant. Being submissive helps a person to make sense of his life in certain ways: it answers the need for purpose in life, and for a sense of efficacy or feeling that one does have control over one's environment (through pleasing the dominant). The Ds relationship also addresses the bottom's need for feeling that one's life and actions are right and good. The dom's will is an end in itself, an ultimate value for her/his slave.

The submissive also receives a sense of self-worth from his/her relationship to her master/mistress. People need to feel that they are important and valuable. Serving is a way of receiving validation and approval by one who is seen as perfect and omnipotent. And when the one who is seen as perfect deems the submissive as unworthy, the emotional result can be devastating.

The break up thus deprives the submissive of the opportunity for feeling competent; undermines the individual's self worth achieved through being a good slave to an esteemed master; and reestablishes the submissive's (often unwanted) necessity of making choices and taking responsibility from which he/she was sheltered while in the relationship. Now, suddenly, difficult judgments about what is right or wrong to do must be made on one's own. The wishes and commands of the dominant partner have been the ultimate source of rightness and goodness for the masochist's feelings. The demands to make decisions, to accept responsibility, to cope with pressure and crises, to prove of identity is shaken by the breakup of a B&D relationship. For the submissive, the correct course of action had always been to please, satisfy and obey the dominant partner. The relationship to the dominant partner thus had taken over as the major value base for the submissive.

Relationship is extremely important to submissives; more so than to their dominant partners, and even more important than sexual activities. All problems of right and wrong had been resolved for the submissive and the anxiety and guilt and doubt that accompany such moral dilemmas had been removed. The submissive needed only submit and obey in delightful dependence.

Finally, the submissive gains a powerful and seemingly viable model of fulfillment in the relationship. The submissive achieves the utmost in intimacy by blending him or herself completely with the partner's will. The submissive also derives strong sexual satisfactions. Thus sexually, emotionally, and spiritually, submission provides intense fulfillment.

What happens when the relationship is over? When the dom leaves, the ultimate source of direction, feelings of competency, self-worth and meaning is gone. The result can be psychologically devastating. Especially when it is not her/his choice, the submissive feels frightened, angry, confused, depressed and overwhelmed.

THE GRIEVING PERIOD
Dealing with relationship break-up is dealing with a phenomenon that is a part of our common human heritage: loss. Especially if the relationship was long-term and sometimes even when it wasn't, the same mechanisms of mourning over that which is lost kick into place. You may mourn the loss of your companion, your lover, your protector, your provider. You may mourn no longer being a part of a pair. And if your life has been lived entirely through your dominant, and the person through whom you lived is no longer there, you may mourn the shattering loss of a whole way of life. Some submissives may mourn the loss of the purpose of their existence. And some, whose sense of self was built upon the dom's approving, validating presence, may find that they are also mourning the loss of that self.

Knowing what to expect in the mourning process may be helpful in knowing that what you're experiencing is what most people go through when they lose someone they love. Knowing that others have gone through it is to know that you're not alone.

How we mourn will depend on our inner strengths and our outer supports and will surely depend on our prior history of love and loss. Often a relationship loss in the present kicks off feelings of unresolved prior losses. Sometimes the loss of someone we love revives our childhood fears of abandonment, the ancient anguish of being little and left. Submissives, especially, who have always related to the dominant as a parental authority figure, are often flooded with intense feelings of fear, rage and abandonment that are residues from childhood traumas..

Generally, the stages of grief are: denial, anger, guilt, acceptance and adaptation. Some disbelief, some denial is a common first reaction. Especially if you didn't see the breakup coming, you may feel like you're in a numbed out state, unable to comprehend what you're hearing. You may spend some time thinking he/she doesn't/couldn't mean it, or thinking they'll come to their senses sooner or later. As the reality sets in, anger is a common next reaction. You hate him or her for abandoning you, especially after you've invested so much of yourself in serving and pleasing . Somehow, in your mind, pleasing them perfectly would ensure that they would always protect and guide you. Now they've betrayed the bond. You feel vulnerable, betrayed, enraged.

Often, guilt and self-recrimination take over. The dom, the ultimate source of good judgement, knowledge and power, must have made the right decision. You feel you must be unworthy. So, of course, you blame yourself. What did I do to drive them away? Could I have been a better slave? Did I not please them? Am I unworthy of their attention? Did they leave for another slave? How is that person able to please where I was not? These feelings are a normal part of this type of relationship mourning.

But, as there is an end to the relationship, there is also an end to the grieving of the relationship. You move your way from shock, denial, anger, and guilt to the completion of the mourning. And although there still will be times when you miss your master/mistress, completion means recovery, acceptance and adaptation.

You'll recover your stability, your energy, your hopefulness, your capacity to enjoy life and to invest in other relationships. You'll accept that the relationship is over - and be a wholer and wiser person for it.

HELP FOR HEALING
If the process of recovering from the loss of your master/mistress seems too awful to contemplate, I've included some tips to recovering from the loss of a love to make the journey a bit smoother.


The tendency will be to blame yourself, because, after all, the dom is always right. Resist the temptation. Doms may need new models for all sorts of their own reasons which my include, believe it or not, their own shortcomings. So be very gentle with yourself - kind, forgiving, tender. Accept that you have an emotional wound, that it is debilitating, and that it will take a while before you are completely well. And for heaven's sake, don't blame yourself for any "mistakes" (real or imagined) that you think brought you this loss.

Get lots of rest, eat well, exercise, remember to take deep breaths, meditate, under-indulge in addictive substances (they retard the mourning process).

Go to your support group (or discover one) and get lots of comfort from people who have gone through similar scenes. People who have survived similar losses can provide support and guidance - and are proof that you too will survive. Stay close to friends and family. Get lots of hugs. Don't forget to laugh. The telephone is a great tool for support. Use it.

The longing to serve may be overwhelming. Don't make the mistake of getting into another situation until you have completed this grieving process. The result could be "rebound" and you won't be making solid decisions. You don't want to create more pain for yourself. Make sure that you're next relationship isn't a reaction from the former one.

Expect to feel afraid. You've been abandoned. The bond, the tie that held you together has been disrupted. You will fear being alone, fear that you'll never have someone to serve again, fear the pain, the desolation and torment that may lie ahead. But remember, fear can help you meet the challenges of life - and it will pass.

Embrace your feelings - its OK to feel depressed, suicidal (feel, not act), angry, guilty, desperate, alone, homicidal. There feelings are a natural part of the healing process. They mean you've loved. And again, they will pass.

When you can, forgive your dom. Don't do it for him/her. Do it for your own peace of mind and the quality of your future relationships.

And finally, begin anew. Let go of the loss and the pain, know that you are a stronger person, have the courage to begin relating again, and know that you are a better person for having loved.

Favourite Time

i was wanting to know do you have a favour day, time and if so why.

For me my favourite day is Sunday, early evening, it is during this time that i make time for myself, i take myself out of the way, and its my time. i kneel and focus on my mantra just to add to the ambience and get lost in my submission. This is also the time that i write my Reflection for Sir, on how my task went during the week, how i felt undertaking it, what my concerns or fears were, what i enjoyed most about it. Then its always lovely to receive Sir's comments on what i have written. Writing my reflection has also enabled me to express myself more. i love my time, its important to me and i just love my Sundays. So do any of my readers have a favourite day or time?

Reflection on my Slut Task

As some of my readers know i am being Mentored and Trained by a wonderful Master and have been undertaking tasks for Him. One of these tasks which i undertook last week was to be a slut for Him for the whole week. Well, what can i say dear readers, my eyes stood out when i read what my task was to be, this was a shock to me, so unexpected (i should know better….lol…Sir can be deliciously wicked at times…lol) i had never been asked to do anything like that before. How did i feel when i read what was being asked of me, i felt shock, panic, excitement, anticipation. Questions flooded my mind, how on earth could i be a slut, its not in my nature!!! What would i be expected to do, thoughts and images were whirling around my head. How would a slut act. After I calmed down..lol i thought about the task ahead, then i emailed Sir with all my questions...lol. Of course He put me at ease right away, and said 'less is more' and gave me suggestions on how i would carry out my task, i was thankful for these.

My task was to start on the Tuesday. i awoke early that morning, full of excitement, planning on what to wear to make myself feel sluttish. i decided on this and how i would interact with strangers, i was so nervous about this because i dont usually make eye contact with people that i pass. i put extra make up on, making my eyes darker and wearing brighter lipstick and off i went. But as i left the house purposely leaving the top button on my shirt open so that my breast was exposed more than usual i felt a weird sense of confidence, i knew i was going to do this, and it worked, i got looks from men as i stood at the bus stop, infact second glances, men were polite to me, allowing me to go in front of them but secretly looking down my shirt, i purposely moved in any way i could to expose my breast even further and do you know what, i loved it, a strange sense of power came over me. i looked forward to walking to the bus every day and through the city to get to work, i walked with a purpose and i ‘worked it’ (…think of Pretty Woman girlies when we first see Julia Roberts on the street, well not necessarily dressed that way!!!...lol)

i done quite a few things that week, both at home and work, things that i wouldn't have done myself, nor thought of, but my mind was like a little minx, thinking what i could get up to next, what i could do to myself, what i could watch. On another occasion I had put sexy lingerie on and set off on my purposeful trip to work but while I was in work I still didn’t feel slutty enough even though the top I was wearing was showing off my cleavage to the max, so I went to the toilets and removed a certain piece of my underwear which automatically heightened my excitement as well as my arousal and i could now feel the material of my trousers rubbing against me!!! How delicious that felt and how slutty I felt walking around in work the whole day with no panties on. i was making eye contact with strange men and holding their eye contact throughout the week. i walked differently, i exaggerated my hip movement, i purposely stroke my hair and along the top of whatever i was wearing as if stroking my breast!! This was not me....lol. But i grew into the role of a slut as well as growing in confidence every day. Was the power of me being a slut for Sir going to my head!!!!...lol . When Sir and i were exchanging emails (although I was not to tell Him anything about how I was completing my task until the end of the week) i told Him how much i was enjoying this, i found it delicious and sexy, salacious and decadent and He asked if it was the submissive in me or was the slut in me enjoying it more, i told Him that i found the slut in me was taking over at times...lol. Sir added to my task by sending me emails throughout my day, telling me i was His salacious little slut, oh how i loved hearing those words, an intense sense of arousal that went through me at those times because it was being verbalized to me. i was thinking of things that would add to my slut nature that was growing more and more as the week progressed and I came up with some exciting ideas to show Him that i wanted to be the perfect slut for Him.

A task i thought that i would never be able to complete, i enjoyed and secretly wish to do again. i loved it, i loved the intenseness of the task, the feeling of arousal i had all week from it, the freedom and release to express my sexual feelings, i felt sexy, sensual, deliciously aroused all at the same time. To try and put the intense feelings I had felt all week is difficult to describe and doesn’t do the task justice because I feel you would need to do it for real then you will know. Now this may be tame for some of my readers but to me it was something that wasn’t within my comfort zone to do, i am not one to put myself out there to be noticed, but oh what power a sub/slut can wield!!!!

i was proud and honored to be Sir’s slut for the week and maybe He will let me be his slut again for him ~smiles wickedly~ to Sir.

Fulfilment

A question that i would like to throw out.

Do you feel your wants and needs as submissive are being fulfilled?? and if not what steps would you take to ensure they would be.

Personally for me i can say without a word of doubt that mine are being met whole heartedly. Thank you and ~smiles at Sir~

Hard Limits

i have been reading blogs and i asked myself how far i would let a Dominant push me to prove my worthiness to him and i have come to the conclusion that if i wasnt comfortable in completing what he asked me to do i would refuse. Does this make me more less of a submissive because i didnt follow through with what he required. If he tried to say use emotional blackmail e.g. 'you would do this if you wanted to prove your love for me', would you still have the same respect for him, would it damage your relationship?, would it damage you emotionally? Would you feel safe playing with him again. Do you feel its right that your safety is put at risk but still you go through with it anyhow because you want to please him so much?

Is it not important to remain true to yourself, your beliefs and your limits? You would advise another do not put themselves in harms way but yet you put yourself in harms way because you think a true submissive would do this. You know its not true, so why go through with it?

Dont get me wrong i know its part of the lifestyle to push ones limits and you rely on the Dominant so much to make sure you stay within the safety those limits, but what about the Dominants who go that little bit further and go beyond this, you know what they ask of you is wrong but yet you still go through with it because they have asked for proof of your devotion to them. WRONG!!!!

So think about what has been asked of you, think about yourself, your safety, your health and most of all your emotional state when asked to undertake a 'hard limit'

Master

A mediocre Master tells, a good Master teaches, an excellent Master explains, but a True Master inspires -- Anonymous

Thank you Sir. You are inspiring me ~smiling~

OBEDIENCE

I would like you to kneel....
I would like you to repeat....
I would like you to read....
I would like your thoughts on....
I would like you to write....
I would like you to do....
I woud like you to touch....
I would like you to smile....
I would like you to wear....
I would like ........

Bliss just bliss

Pain

This is more of a questions than a posting. But i was wondering would you as a Dominant inflict pain on yourself so as to judge the amount of pain that you would be administring to your submissive especially if you are not in the same room as each other especially in LDRs? Also have you experienced practices that you use on your submissive on yourself beforehand? i suppose these questions are really going out to the Dominants out there.

Submission

What is submission? Submission is an act whereby one gives control over to another, this can be a scary prospect for someone to do, so it is very important that the person that you give the control to is someone who you trust implicitly. It is important for the submissive to still have a certain amount of control in how much control she will allow the Dominant to have. The majority of women and men who are submissive are usually very strong, opinionated, articulate people, not the type of people one would expect to be submissive, but it is a yearning that comes from deep inside the person, they want nothing more than to hand control over to another, to control as much of the submissives life as they allow, also more important there has to be an emotional bond between Dominant and submissive.

One reads there are different levels of submission but each person fits into their own role of submission and what they wish to gain from it, what their needs are, and if a Dominant can given them what they require, one wonders who the stronger person is in this type of relationship, most people think probably think its the Dominant, i beg to differ.

To be submissive comes from deep within oneself, its a need, a thirst that needs to be quenched. The thought of giving over your loyality, trust, faith, passion, love to someone who you want to belong to is an amazing, fulfilling feeling. Each submissive has their own personal level of submission that they feel comfortable in giving, but sometimes with a little more push from their Dominant they give that little bit extra.

But not all submission has to have physical contact, a lot of the time it can be mental control, either via email, phone, but at other times it can be intensely physical.

Then there are subs who are not submissive but enjoy the dynamics of the play, but i feel true submission comes from deep within, its natural, its in your being, though i didnt feel this until it was brought out more by my previous Master. Though i must admit when i was younger i felt different, loved different things, loved spilling wax onto myself, loved being chased, caught and tied up, loved pretending to be an animal, and then being walked around on a piece of rope.

To me its the mental control that i find exciting, having someone control everything that i do, from what i eat, read, watch in my daily life to physical control, bondage, sensory deprivation and of course a little pain!!

When one thinks about it i am sure there is a little bit of submission in all of us, to have someone take that control from you, to take care of you, i think even Dominants have had this thought at some point in their life. Submission isnt a weakness, not in the least, it takes a strong person to put their trust in someone, to let them basically hold your life in their hands, that is true submission to me.

Hiding

How does it feel to hide behind who you really are:

To hide behind the emotions that you want to express and share
To hide behind the things that the vanilla world doesn’t completely understand
To hide behind the physical and mental needs you want to experience and learn from
To hide behind the mask of who you truly are and what you want
To hide behind the constraints of normality of the vanilla world
To hide behind the dictation of what is suppose to be right and wrong
To hide behind the yearning that comes from deep within you
To hide behind the eyes of someone who is lost and wants to be found
I am that person, I am hiding

Pics

Hi was away for a few days, but am back and raring to go...lol.. i said i would share a few more photos of Zee Maitri and here they are, i love the use of the lighting in the first one, he has a video clip of shibari using darkness and then light coming through the darkness around his models.

WOW

Well what can i say, i am so delighted to notice that the 'hits' to my blog have gone over 5000, well i never thought that i would get to that amount, it is so lovely to know that people have taken the time to visit my little blog, so i want to say a big 'thank you' to you all and i hope you will keep returning.

A smiling blossom xxx

How Beautiful

i found this picture by the photographer Zee Maitri, he has some beautiful shibari photos and videos, and i just love everything about it, the colours, the pose of the model, the way the ropework is around her body. How romantic is this photo, i just love this, aaahhhh how i wish that was me, so i thought i would share it with you.

Contracts

What is a contract within BDSM. Contracts within BDSM are usually between a Master and submissive/slave. These can be very detailed, or just something that is in agreement between both parties, it is whatever both parties want and indepth as they feel is necessary.

For some within the community a contract like this can be as binding as a marriage certificate and i feel more significant because of the dynamics and intensity of the relationship between Master and submissive.

A lot can be detailed in the contract from the length of time it should last especially if both Master and submissive are just starting out on their relationship to detailing rules, rituals, protocols, and limits, really whatever is needed for the relationship to work it should be included in the contract.

A sample copy of a contract could include the following:

D/s Contract

I, ________________________, with a free mind and an open heart; do request of
_______________________ that He accept the submission of my will unto His and to take me into His care and guidance, that W/we may grow together in love, trust and mutual respect. The satisfaction of His wants, desires, and whims are consistent with my desire as a submissive to be found pleasing to Him. To that end, I offer Him use of my time, talents, and abilities. Further, I ask, in sincere humility, that, as my Master, He accept the keeping of my body for the fulfillment and enhancement of O/our sexual, spiritual, emotional, and intellectual needs. To achieve this, He may have unfettered use of my body any time, any place, in front of anyone; to keep or to give away, as He will determine.

I ask that He guide me in any sexual, sensual, or scene-related behavior, both together with, and separate from Him, in such a way as to further my growth as a person.

I request of _______________________, as my Master, that he use the power vested in His role; to mold and shape me; assisting me to grow in strength, character, confidence, and being, and that He continue to help me to develop my artistic and intellectual abilities.

In return, I agree:

To obey His commands to the best of my ability.

To strive to overcome feelings of guilt or shame, and all inhibitions that interfere with my capability to serve Him and limit my growth as His submissive.

To maintain honest and open communication.

To reveal my thoughts, feelings, and desires without hesitation or embarrassment.

To inform Him of wants and perceived needs, recognizing that He is the sole judge of whether or how these shall be satisfied.

To strive toward maintenance of a positive self-image and development of realistic expectations and goals.

To work with Him to become a happy and self-fulfilled individual.

To work against negative aspects of my ego and my insecurities that would interfere with advancement of these aims.

My surrender as a submissive is done with the knowledge that nothing asked of me will demean me as a person, and will in no way diminish my own responsibilities toward making utmost use of my potential. In recognition of my family obligations, nothing will be required of me that will in any way damage or harm my children, nor interfere with the performance of my duties as mother and as wife.

This I, _______________________, do entreat, with lucidity and the realization of what this means, both stated and implied, in the conviction that this offer will be understood in the spirit of faith, caring, esteem and devotion in which it is given.

Should either of U/us find that our aspirations are not being well served by this agreement, find this commitment too burdensome, or for any other reason wish to cancel, E/either may do so by verbal notification to the O/other, in keeping with the consensual nature of this agreement. W/we both understand that cancellation means a cessation of the control stated and implied within this agreement, not a termination of O/our relationship as friends and lovers. Upon cancellation, each of U/us agrees to offer to the other H/his or her reasons and to assess our new needs and situation openly and lovingly.

This agreement shall serve as the basis for an extension of O/our relationship, committed to in the spirit of loving and consensual dominance and submission with the intention of furthering self-awareness and exploration, promoting health and happiness, and improving both O/our lives.

I offer my consent to submission to ______________________________ under the terms stated above on this the ________ day of _____________ in the year ________.

____________________________
Signature of Submissive

I offer my acceptance of submission by ______________________________ under the terms stated above on this the ________ day of ______________ in the year ________.

____________________________
Signature of Dominant



When i was with my previous Master we had talked about having a contract between us, at the time i would have loved to have had this, especially as the relationship was only new and of course all new subs want to be owned in this way with their Master, between a contract and their collar what more could a submissive ask for...lol, but sadly i never did get my contract which is probably a blessing in disguise given the way things ended it would have destroyed the whole meaning of this.

How do other submissives feel about a contract, would they have one? or would verbal words have the same effect?

Beautiful Day

What a beautiful day
The sun is shinning
The air is warm against my skin
Those lovely submissive feelings running through me
i dont want them to go away
i want to stay like this forever
What a beautiful day


~smiles~ blossom xx

Update on Me

Hi everyone

i know i havent been posting on my blog lately but i have been very very busy elsewhere ...lol.

i just want to say that i am enjoying this so much, Sir has been absolutely brilliant with me. He has been mentoring me for two weeks now and we have started from scratch basically. i cant believe what i have achieved in tasks, physical and written in the first week, i am proud of myself and Sir is proud of me also. He has commented and given me positive feedback on everything i have achieved and even when i partly failed on a certain written task, He explained what would have happened if that had of happened between a Master and his sub. We have a lot of discussion in our posts which is amazing.

We are very open and honest with each other, and He is very patient with me and allowing me time to express myself further. All i can say is 'what the hell was i doing all those years with someone else and not really gaining anything from it'. i have experienced so so much in such a short space of time, and this was how it should have been.

im am growing in confidence each time. i look forward to each and every task He sets for me, because im doing what is natural to me. i love it when He picks something out that i have written and tells me that 'i have summed it up nicely' about a particular piece i had to write, this tells me i am definitely moving in the right direction.

i panic at times 'oh my, will i have time to do this', but i do because i want to. He has so many ideas for tasks, some with a 'twinkle in his eye'...lol but i am loving every second of what i am doing, i cannot thank Him enough for sharing this with me.

my proudest achievements to date was an essay on submission which i thoroughly enjoyed doing and also pleasing Sir with everything that i have done. But mostly i am proud of myself for this and i just want to say that 'i love it'...lol. As Sir puts it, this is for me and my needs, how lovely is that as this lifestyle is mostly about the Dominants needs but He is putting mine first. ~smiles~

i hope to write more in my blog and share some more updates with you on a regular basis.

blossom xx

Punishment

i have often wondered what type of punishments Dominants give to their submissives when they felt they have been let down by them or whether they didnt feel they completed a task well enough.

When i was with my previous Master and because we were long distance often my punishment was to ignore me for whatever length of time he deemed necessary, obviously i didnt like this type of punishment at all, i didnt like the lonliness i felt being unable to speak to him on the phone, text or email, also remembering back i didnt have to do much to warrant such a punishment!!! probably suited his needs during those times.

So i would be interested to hear what other types of punishment Dominants have used, we all know about physical punishments, e.g. pegs etc but i would like to know more about what other type of mental punishments could be used.

Smiling inwardly and outwardly

i know i have had a bad few days with family stuff and i have had a bad few weeks with myself and submission, feeling lost and not having anyone to share it with. Well since before i started my blog i was writing to a Dom who gave me such great support during the time of the break-up between my Master and i. We have been corresponding every day since then, and He has been my rock. Well when He read my previous post on 'Lost' He wrote to me and said how sorry He was to hear how i was feeling as not long before that post i wrote to Him to tell Him how positive i was becoming. Well the long and short of it is that He has agreed to become my Mentor/Protector, to help me through the fog, to get to where i want to be and help me fulfil my goal of belonging to someone.

There may be some things i can share with you all on my blog obviously with His permission, but in the meantime W/we have a private blog where i can express all my fears, concerns, worries as well as all the positive things that will come out of this. i cant contain the excitement i am feeling and the gratitude i bestow on Him for taking me under His wing and guiding me through all this.

Colbie Caillat - Bubbly

I just found this song and i love it, lovely feel good song, hope you enjoy.

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Mood setting

Hi Guys

i was wondering if any of you set the mood when you are playing? Do you use music, photography etc when you wish to set the scene for your Dom or submissive. Or do you feel music could destroy the scene, that you may get carried away if you were being flogged? Or do you not use anything to set the mood and just let your emotions take over?

Im back

Hi All

was taking some time out, have had a very bad week due to a family illness and death, so obviously my mind has been elsewhere, but im making my way back.

blossom xx

Lost

Im feeling a bit lost at the moment, is there any point in carrying on with my submission when i cant share it with anyone special.

Switch

What does switch mean: a switch is someone who participates in BDSM activities sometimes as a top and other times as a bottom or (in the case of dominance and submission) sometimes as a dominant and other times as a submissive. Partners may switch roles based on mood, desire, or to allow each partner to experience their preferred activity. For example, a switch may be in a relationship with someone of the same primary BDSM orientation (e.g., two dominants), so switching provides each partner with an opportunity to realize his or her BDSM needs.

The act of "switching" may also refer to a spontaneous reversal of roles, initiated by either the bottom or the top.

My previous master and i had talked about it from time to time but i could never really get my head around it, given i always just assumed a Dom was always Dominant and the sub was always submissive. I found it hard to grasp why a Dominant would wish to become submissive, what would he get from that given i assumed that all his pleasure was his control over me, why then would he wish to change roles. I told him that i couldnt assume the role of a Domme in that it wasnt inside of me, i couldnt take that control over from him, i wouldnt know how to dominant him. Needless to say that it never took place between us.

Then i started to read online about about this type of play, i also read about Dominants who liked to dress in womens clothes and be treated as a sub (serving sub) and oh so many other things, and i know this in this lifestyle that really anything goes really but it has really threw me, i just cant get my head around if a guy wishes to be a Dom why then would he want to sub to a sub. i would want my future Dominant to be truely Dominant. (if and when that ever happens)

So i thought i would ask readers if they have found themselves in the same situation and how they coped with it? What would they do if their Dominant asked this of them? and what do other Dominants think of this?

Cumming on Command

I was reading a question on fetlife regarding Cumming on Command and i am quite intrigued by this, wanting to know can this actually be achieved by a Dom and their submissive. You read that Doms say their submissive can do this either by a certain choice of words and no physical contact or certain touches.

As this is something that i have never experienced i was wanting to know if any Doms or subs who read my blog have been trained to do this? Are there any Doms who have successfully trained their subs to do this? Is this a long process to actually train a submissive to cum on command? Have any subs been trained to achieve this? How does it feel to do this without any physical contact? Do you get the same enjoyment?

Again more questions from me!!!..lol. Looking forward to hearing what O/others have to say on this.

Shaven or Unshaven

When i was with my previous Master i had to shave my pubic hair for Him, this was to verify His complete control over me, also this was part of His rules that i had to follow. He would inspect me to ensure that i had done it properly and if i hadnt He would then take the razor and complete the process (and i must admit i loved Him shaving me). To me there is something ritualistic in a Dom shaving His submissive, she is open and exposed to Him, with a steel blade, so there is a huge amount of trust there. The care that He took whilst doing it and the aftercare of rubbing gel into the exposed area to ensure that it is cool and soft which helps of course with itching, all added to the glorious experience and it got quite hot and horny at times...lol.

I know there are other ways of clearing the area of hair e.g. waxing but for me being shaved by Him meant so much more. I loved being shaven, it meant that every part of my body was exposed to Him for His enjoyment to look at, to touch, with my hair to be parted so my neck was exposed to Him as i presented myself each time to Him. The feeling i experienced being shaven and exposed when i wore something as i walked, or when He touched me, tasted me, was heightened greatly. Oh how i miss those times.

Anyhow i know this is the preference for the majority of Doms to have their submissives shaven but i was wanting to ask the question do submissives prefer their Dom shaved or not. Personally i prefer not shaved but trimmed. So i would be interested in hearing what others think and even from Doms (if i may be so bold to ask) do they like to be clean around that area?

Just back

Back again folks was away for a few days and i had the most marvellous time away in the city that never sleeps!!!!, and im still absolutely shattered..lol.

Will get back on track with my blog shortly.

blossom xx

To Bathe

i was talking with a Dom friend online and the subject came up regarding being bathed. He told me that this was something a sub who belonged to Him loved to do and i said it was also something that i loved to do with my previous Master.

i told Him there was nothing more than i enjoyed to run a bath for Him then undress him and carefully put his clothes away, crawl to the bath and kneel beside him whilst i bathed Him. Then to dry Him and crawl along beside Him to the bed where i then massaged oil into Him. Then to snuggle alongside Him and be held as a reward.

This gave me just as much pleasure as He got receiving it and i was wondering if other Doms or subs enjoyed giving or receiving such a simple pleasure as this?

Sex appeal

How sexy is this lady? personnally i think she just ooozzzeeeessss it..lol

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Rituals

I thought i would write a small piece on Rituals and seek what O/others thought of these and if T/they had requested or undertook these.

There are many rituals during our everyday life, things we automatically do whether its in the house or during work, and some of these make us feel comfortable and in control of our lives. Do we say the same thing when it comes to rituals with a bdsm slant.

When i was with my previous Master i undertook rituals that He had set for me and i found these a joy to do given that W/we were in a long distance relationship, and completing these gave me a sense of closeness to Him, kept me focused on O/our relationship, gave me a sense of belonging.

These weren't major things, they were small things that were important between us. For example: Undertaking my chant first thing in the morning whilst kneeling, i wore an everyday collar but had to have my leather collar on me at all times, when He came online i had to greet him in a certain manner, usually naked and collared, lowering my eyes whilst on cam. I loved having these small rituals private to us, no one else aware of what was happening, special times.

These small rituals and there were others, but these started off during my training until they became automatic and fluid. But each time i completed a ritual over the years W/we were together i still got the same sense of pleasure knowing that i was making Him happy and strenthening the bond between U/us.

How do O/others feel about rituals? Do you see any point in having them? What type of rituals did you carry out?

For me they were a very important part of me and i miss those small things terribly.

Miserable

Miserable weather

Miserable day

Miserable mood

Miserable memories

Hello

Hello

Just to say im back again, faulty equipment kept me away...lol, so hopefully will get back on track again.

blossom xx

Collars

I was reading a post on fetlife about the wearing of collars whether its a physical or emotional collar.

When i was collared to a previous Dom i wore physical collars, an everyday collar and then when we played on cam and in real life when we met up i wore my leather collar with leash attached. For me i couldnt wait to wear something that He put around my neck, even though i knew i belonged to Him in every aspect it was the icing on the cake as they say, when i felt His hands around my neck and then placing each collar on my bare neck. To me this meant the world and i wore each of my collars with pride. So i loved the feeling of a physical collar, showing proudly His ownership of me, even though no one knew anything about what i was wearing and what it meant, but i did, *smiles into myself*.

My favourite collar was my leather one with my leash attached to it, i loved sitting by His feet while He held it in His hand or draped it over the arm of a chair or took me for a walk. Putting on that collar just filled me with so much feeling and emotion.

So i thought i would ask what the readers of my blog thought about collars?

Sensory Deprivation

I had mentioned in a comment on my video clip showing a girl wearing a latex ball that i would feel claustrephobic if i was to wear a hood or even anything over my face. This got me thinking about Sensory Depriviation.

So what is Sensory Deprivation, its the deliberate removal of our senses. Whether its the wearing of a hood, a blindfold, ear plugs, gloves etc, and im sure somewhere in the bdsm world there are other mechanisms to remove other senses etc, of which i wouldnt be aware given i havent had much experience or practice in this type of play. Now a part of me would feel safe enough wearing a blindfold or ear plugs as i feel that this is quite erotic the not knowing of what is going to happen to you next, the knowledge that your Dom is in the room with you or is he???, trying to feel any vibration around you, the nervousnous you feel until know He is with you.

This is obviously very light sensory deprivation but what about those who wear a hood or a suit, i often wonder how they cope with the wearing of these items of clothing. Even the look of a hood is terrifying to me!!!

But yet they get so much out of wearing these items, how do they do it??? what feelings do they get out of it??? how do they manage to breathe??? is there special training to wear these items??? is the same type of aftercare given coming out of their confinement??? i would imagine it would be different given the intensity of what they are experiencing. i would think that great care would need to be given, because i would imagine that if this type of play isnt done correctly then this could cause the sub anxiety, or play havoc with their imagination. To me this type of play isnt for the faint hearted...lol

Would a Dom who enjoyed this type of play try to push his sub's limits to trying this out if they knew it was a hard limit for the sub??? How far would he go???

As usual i have a lot of questions (wouldnt be like me!!!) so I would love to hear other's opinions/thoughts on this type of play and if they have experienced it and what they thought about it.

Fun or Not

Would this be anyone's cup of tea!!!! You would think the guy in the mask would come better prepared, im sure he is light headed after blowing the balloon up...lol

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Massage

Well readers i just have to share this with you. I have come back from a couple of days away yet again!!!!!...lol and have just had the most superb deep massage ever. Dont get me wrong the pain i felt at the bottom of my back and the tops of my shoulders was sore, very sore, but as she pushed down with each movement it was the sensations that i received each time going down to a certain spot!!!! then the lightness of her touch on each pressure point all i can say is wow, such a glorious feeling of pain mixed in with pleasure.

Then i had a leg scrub, the feeling of that being rubbed into each leg, again a yummy feeling, and the hotness of the cloth washing it away. But then came the cool silkiness of the cream oil being rubbed into each leg, the smoothness of each stroke up to the tops of my thighs...mmmm. Hot stones then being applied to massage each leg, well what can i say, again another superb sensation reaching a certain point, what wicked thoughts i had then!!!! wrong or what?????

Oh i could do with a massage like that every day and i would never say no...lol.

Has any others experienced sensations like that when receiving one?

What to talk about

Obviously there is loads to talk about regarding bdsm, but most of the blogs that i have been reading or looking through are about submissives and their relationships with their Masters. I feel at a loss sometimes that i dont have that myself and begin to wonder what is the point of carrying on with a blog if there isnt that much in it that is interesting to readers. Is this what readers want to read in blogs the dynamics of a D/s relationship or random thoughts, some topics. It would be nice to get ideas of what readers would like to read.

Pet Play

Searching through the multitude bdsm sites i have come across pet play or training which include pony, kitten, puppy to name but a few, probably the more popular form of play and i was wondering if this would appeal to the majority of submissives or does it take a special type of submissive. The submissives and trainers who do have this type of relationship would it be sexual or non sexual for them? For example the simple stroke of a submissives neck or hair would this be classed as sexual or a pony girl pulling a sulky with her owner in it would this be classed as sexual?

I use to wear my leash at times and would walk behind my Master but i never thought of it as any type of pet play, i assumed it was to do with pure control, does it mean that subconsciously that i was open to perhaps becoming a kitten or puppy for Him if he had of taken it that little bit further, a little bit of me thinks that i may have enjoyed this type of training/role play? To hear One say during aftercare the spoken words 'well done my little pet' i think there is something warm and cuddly in those words.

But what is exactly involved in this type of role play, i would imagine taking on all the mannerisms of the particular pet you would wish to become, whether its barking, meowing, or even whinnying, being playful, cuddling up to your owner, being fed, eating out of a bowl, personnally i think that this would be my limit, I am in awe of those submissives who go the whole way in fully becoming the particular animal they wish to be. For example pony girls, who wear full harnesses, masks etc, who trot whilst pulling sulkies, i would love to know what they actually get out of this type of roleplay.

Can the tables be turned during these role plays, one would always assume that its the submissive who becomes the pet but could the submissive take on a more dominant role, i dont know that much about it.

I would be interested in hearing from those who have had the pleasure of this type of roleplay and what they got from it, how it made them feel, would they like to be in that role constantly?

Training Techniques

I was wondering if Doms have favourite training techniques that they liked to use when undertaking the training of a new sub and if they would like to share some of the techniques with us as there may be potential subs out there wondering what types of training would be used should they decide to go down the road of bdsm.

Break

Hi fellow bloggers

i will be away for a few days, but i just wanted to say thanks to those who have left comments and make my blog worth reading. But also to those who pop in from time to time to have a quiet read and hopefully take away something from the posts and comments.

blossom xx

Protector

I wrote a post about mentorship and i said i would write a post about a Protector.

I will start by saying that i think a Protector would take the place of the Master whilst at an event or where a sub would need to be accompanied. Also it would have to be someone that a Master and/or sub would have complete trust in. To me this is an extremely important position especially if play is involved afterall a Master is putting the life of His sub in their hands.

But what does a sub do who doesnt have a Dom or Master they can call upon? Does the same amount of protection apply whether its online or real time? How far should a Protector protect? Also what if there is distance between them what actions can a Protector implement to protect the sub? or would there be any point in protecting someone who does not live in the same area, do they involve others in this?

I suppose there are lots of actions/steps to undertake this important role. Would the Protector have limitations, what if a sub doesnt agree to these, does the Protector just abandon the sub?

I realise i have actually asked more questions than given any answers or opinions with regard to actions that could be taken to protect a sub, e.g. presence, open and consistent communication, phone numbers etc.

I would really be interested in hearing from Doms or sub who have found themselves in this role in the past or are currently protecting a sub or being protected and what actions have been put in place.

blossom x

Corsets

Oh girls she makes it look so easy. To have a waist like that and the beauty of being locked into it!!

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What if...

What if
i cant move on

What if
i lose my submissiveness

What if
im not strong enough to carry on with this lifestyle

What if
i just give up

What if
im unable to give my all to Another

What if
i start to doubt my ability in my submission

What if
i never have those feelings ever again

What if
these doubts stay with me

What if
just what if ....

Beautiful Morning

I woke up early this morning, looked out at the cover of crisp white ice that is lining the footpaths, i went out to my back garden in my pjs and watched my breathe coming out heating the air as i exhaled, and i thought to myself what a beautiful morning.

Hope everyone has a beautiful morning where ever you are.

blossom x

First attempt at story

It was suggested to me by my Dom friend to try and write a piece of fiction, well i said to Him i dont think i could do anything like that, but He coaxed me into trying it at least, so here is my attempt, i hope you wont be too critical of it..lol. Thank you Sir for motivating me.

FIRST STEPS…

Katie sat on the tube, as usual in her own world, thinking of the conversation she had with her Master the previous night, she like to do this after each time they spoke, going over what they had talked about, picking out parts of their conversation which appealed to her, which gave her the greatest joy. She got off the tube and walked to the hotel, each step quickening as she had to pick up her instructions at exactly 1.30 pm, no sooner no later and she was scared she would be late. Finally she got to the hotel lobby, she looked at her watch it was 1.15 pm so she thought “ oh good, in time”. There was a bit of a queue at the desk but that shouldn’t take too long to shorten. But no, it was now after 1.25 pm, panic starting to set in now, “what do I do now, its not my fault that there is a problem at the desk”, she thought to herself. But He was very specific, no sooner, no later. She couldn’t take the chance and at exactly 1.30 pm she interrupted the irate customer and apologized to them but it was very urgent that she needed to pick up an envelope.

She turned to the receptionist and gave her name and asked if an envelope had been left for her, the receptionist looked at her post and handed the envelope to her. Katie thanked them both and turned and walked a chair in a quiet corner of the hotel lobby. She took a few moments to calm herself and a few deep breathes, she wondered to herself if He had witnessed her dilemma at the desk and how she handled that.

She looked down at the small cream envelope clasped in her hands, nerves surging throughout her whole being, she heard herself asking “what on earth am i doing”, and gave a nervous smile to herself. This is what she wanted, she knew that, this would be the first time that she would see Him for real. Turning it over in her hands to open it, she hesitated, nervous to think what He had written and asked her to complete prior to their meeting. Katie looked around her through the people in the lobby to see if she could catch a glimpse of Him in the crowd, hoping to see Him, to know she wasn’t alone at this moment, but there was no sign of Him, she felt a little deflated as she had hoped that He would have witnessed her being confident, something she didn’t feel she was at the best of times.

Taking out the small card, the first thing she noticed was his penmanship, the flow of the written words and then she glanced through the instructions before she read them more carefully, a smile came upon her mouth as He had addressed her as ‘lil pet’ before each instruction. Those two little words calmed her immediately and brought a sense of ownership to her in her little corner.

His instructions:

lil pet go to the ladies toilet and take a picture of yourself in the items that I asked you to wear on your route to the hotel, then to take another picture once you have remove your panties and send these pictures to Me. You are then to go back and sit in the lobby for 15 minutes with your legs slightly apart so that anyone sitting facing you and decides to look can have a glorious look at your smooth pussy.

lil pet then take the lift to the 3rd floor and go to room 331, when you arrive in the room you are to undress, shower, put your leather collar on the bed, but leave the door of the room ajar, return to the bed and kneel at the side of it, put on your blindfold and wait until Master arrives.

The nerves that Katie felt reading this, the things He has asked her to do made her feel so out of her comfort zone, gave her the feeling of vunerability of being partially naked whilst walking and sitting among people, the vunerabilty of being completely naked in a room with the door left open, the uneasiness that she felt at that particular request, as it could mean that anyone passing could walk into the room.

But she wanted it, she craved it, she needed it, she wanted Him to want her, she wanted to do whatever pleased Him, she wanted to give him complete control and trust of her very being.

Katie sat for a few minutes more, composed herself, put the card back into the envelope along with the room key that was inside as well and walked to the ladies toilet to start His demands.

Katie ensured that the toilets where empty and undressed in the cubicle, only opening the door to allow her to take the photo on her phone in the large mirror facing the cubicle, firstly with her matching white lacey bra and panties, suspenders and black silk stockings that had a red corset braiding effect on the top of the stocking. Then quickly she removed her panties to take the other photo requested, nerves making her stumble in her black crocodile patent heels. Hands shaking, fumbling over the phone to take the last picture, all the time hoping that no one would walk in on her. After she finished she quickly closed the door to the toilet, there she sat down, gathering her nerves, and send the photos to her Master. As she was putting her clothes back on and putting her panties into her bag her phone made the usual phone ring, a tone that was assigned to Him, so she knew when she heard it, it was to be answered immediately.

She answered immediately “Hello Sir”

He replied “My lil pet done well for her first task, you shall be rewarded for this”

Katie smiling down the phone answered “thank you Sir”

He finished the conversation with “continue” and hung up.

She felt ecstatic hearing from Him and how pleased He was with her.

She came out of cubicle and freshened herself up in the mirror, gathered her bags and walked into the lobby, strangely feeling more confident, “i am going to do this, i am going to do this” she repeated over and over to herself.

Katie found a seat in the middle of the lobby, picking a seat that no one was sitting at, hoping that no one would sit there, she put her bags down beside her and by the time she looked up, an elderly gentleman and she presumed his wife sat facing her. “Oh my” she said to herself. She thought “would He know if I completed this”, but no, she knew she had to continue, otherwise what was the point of this whole thing. So she pulled her skirt up to above her knees and opened her legs apart slightly. She looked at her watch and it said 2.00 pm, the next 15 minutes were the longest that she had spent, it was as if this was never going to end. She knew the man noticed that she had no panties on, as he was pulling at his trousers as he was re-arranging his cock to a more comfortable position, she tried not to look at him and concentrate on a magazine she had picked up from the table at the side of the sofa.

Finally the 15 minutes had ended, she put the magazine down and picked her bags up, stood up and re-arranged her skirt, bent down to pick up her bags knowing that the outline of the suspenders would show through her skirt as it tighten when she bent over. Then she looked at the man as she went to walk away, he smiled up at her and she noticed a bigger bulge in his trousers as she walked away. She smiled quietly to herself and walked to the elevator and pressed the button to take her to the 3rd floor.

Mentorship

i had a conversation with a Dom about Mentorship and Protector and what that means to individual Doms and submissives. He gave me his interpretation of what these meant to Him but that it might be idea to find out what it means to other Doms and subs.

I think i will talk about mentorship in the first instance and will address Protector at another time.

What does mentorship mean to Y/you? To me it would mean that the Dom would need to have knowledge and experience of the lifestyle. To be trustworthy and approachable. Having the time to guide, support and advise the submissive on a regualar basis, until such time as B/both feel that it is no longer required. For the Dom not to take advantage of the submissive. I also think that it would help if the Dom and submissive have the basis of a friendship, it would make it much easier for the submissive to freely express herself and the Dom wouldnt have to worry about trying to drag everything out of the submissive.

Again i suppose there are different levels of mentorship and i would imagine it could run into other roles that a Dom may have, e.g. Trainor where there would be more physical guidance needed.

Does a mentor enforce punishment or restriction of any kind? I dont think so, i would imagine that this would come under the auspice of the Trainor, but i could be wrong.

i would be interested in what O/others thought about what mentorship means to them and their expectations from receiving it.

blossom

Senses

i smell His scent
Through the air it surrounds me

i hear His movements
As He walks around me

i taste His sex
As He feeds his stiffness to me

i feel His touch
As His strong hands envelope me

But i cannot see Him
As His blindfold darkens me

Orgasm Denial or Chasity Belts

Orgasm denial is used sometimes in BDSM as a punishment to a sub, but also as part of play. i myself have had this applied to me in a previous relationship, in fact i would say that the majority of submissives have had this applied to them on one or more occasion. I must admit i loved it, loved the intensity that i received from the lack of touch, loved the thoughts going through my head, knowing that i couldnt touch myself and when showering only to clean and rinse myself. i love the thought of someone having that control over me, teasing me during my denial, through my frustrations, wicked smile here, and oh the joy when one is finally given the permission to indulge onself and the joy that the other person gets hearing your release and enjoyment you receive.

But i came across a site showing Chasity Belts and i must admit i think they are so erotic looking, both for female and males. i wonder how all those centuries ago how maidens wore those to be kept from pleasuring themselves as well as straying. My preference would be the orgasim denial as i dont think i could wear a chasity belt, but thats not to say i wouldn't have to do as told!!!!

Here are some pics.

Womens Belts

Love the idea of the thigh bands which can be attached to the belt.

New Name

Finally i have given myself the name of 'blossom' no more 'lonely sub' i am moving forward.

Quotes

Quotes that i like relating to BDSM:

"The eye of the master will do more work than both his hands." - Benjamin Franklin

"It's the submissives that show to others what type of Dom owns them." - Anonymous

"No kind of sensation is keener and more active than pain it's impressions are unmistakable." - Marquis De Sade

"The very instant that I saw you, did my heart fly to Your service; there resides, To make me slave to it; and for Your sake..." - William Shakespeare

"no woman truly knows what she is, until she has worn a collar." -Unknown

I love the William Shakespeare quote and the one underneath it regarding wearing of a collar which i have had the privledge to wear in the past, there is nothing more delicious than wearing the collar of a Master, the way it makes you feel, the protection it gives you, so many emotions come from wearing such a special thing.

ls

Whats not to like